Wonderful Feeling

I'm not sure how many of you know, but one of my aunts is a nun. She is also a nurse and helped our family take care of each of my parents at home while they were sick. Aunt Carol is an amazing woman. She teaches, goes fly fishing, ties her own flies (was even on David Letterman as the "Fly fishing nun", etc. Because she is a nun she has also taken a vow of poverty. When mom passed away, she wanted to make sure Aunt Carol was taken care of. However, because of the vow of poverty we couldn't give her the money as she would have had to give it to the church. Instead, my brother and I took it and it is at her disposal as her "travel fund." Aunt Carol loves to travel both within the US and outside. She did an amazing trip to Wales where she took underpriveledged kids on a fly fishing trip over there.

A few weeks ago she called as she and Aunt Pedi (my honorary aunt. They have been in the convent together and friends since Carol was 16) wanted to go spend some time in Vegas. I think she also had a convention out there (not totally clear on all the details as she called my brother and he just told me they needed money from the travel fund). So I popped the check in the mail to pay for their trip with a little note that it was money from heaven.

I got a message from Aunt Carol tonight. She and Aunt Pedi were sitting at the Venetian enjoying a fabulous meal while enjoying the sounds of someone singing opera. After their meal they were going to head down and see The Phantom of the Opera. She was so excited! She sounded just like a little kid. They were having a fabulous time and wanted to call and say thank you. It was the cutest message.

It made me so happy to hear how delighted they were to get away and be able to play. I love the fact that I'm able to help contribute to that kind of excitement and joy and give a little back to two people who have given so much!! You know how some moments in life remind you of all that is important and good in the world? As silly as it sounds, this was one of those moments for me. Put a giant smile on my face.

This moment of joy was brought to you by the letter V and the number 2.

Walking on Broken Glass (or, My $$$ Weekend)

As some of you know, my car window was broken Saturday night during the Spike's Blood Drive. That was a total buzz kill (if I'd had a buzz) at 4:15am. (I'll post a separate blog with an actual update of my truly wonderful weekend.) After heading into work this morning, I decided it would be a good idea to take that in and get it fixed. Spoke to my insurance guy and since my deductible is $500, no point in filing a claim. Left work at noon and brought it into the shop. I also needed an oil change. As I was chatting with the mechanic (who is hilarious and I adore) I asked when the timing belt was supposed to be replaced on this particular car. It turns out 7 years or 105,000 miles. Well, I'm at 117,000 miles and it's never been changed. How much is that going to run? Yikes! He then said, "Yeah, but if it goes..." My response to my mechanic, "It really sucks when you have me by the balls that I don't even have." Might as well add that to the list. Just picked it up from the shop (huge thanks to Tanya for driving me!!!!) and here's the damage:

New window in my car: $226.79
Oil/filter/lube: $ 26.25
New timing belt: $823.14
Slight discount given: $ -78.83

Grand total: $1045.15

Being able to have a successful fundraiser with my vamps: Priceless....or in this case, $1045.15. :-)

Ah, the joys of owning a car and being able to enjoy the open road.

This moment of expenditure was brought to you by the letter B for broken and the number 1045.

My First Photo Shoot

This past weekend was packed with activities. I got home from work late on Friday night. I was supposed to go to a friend's house for a birthday party. I fixed some food and made the mistake of sitting down on the couch. Next thing I know it's midnight. Oops, guess I'm not going to the party! I went to bed and got a total of 12 hours of sleep. Rock the heck on!

Saturday I had my first photo shoot. Spike's Vampire Bar (from Burning Man) is doing a fundraiser by creating a 'Girls of Spike's' calendar. Basically a bunch of hot women (and me) in goth/fetish wear. My friend Tanya was our photographer. I was pretty nervous going into it for lots of reason: poor self-image, never done a proper photo shoot before, etc. It turned out to be A LOT of fun! Tanya was great. It helps that I love her and completely trust her. I was at ease the entire time and we laughed our way through the shoot. We each did one outfit, had a break where we changed and then shot a second outfit. She took some AMAZING photos! I want to know where she found my doppleganger and took photos of her instead of me. There's no way I'm that hot! Amazing what a good photographer can do isn't it? I'm thrilled that I'm going to end up with photos that I actually like of myself.

After the shoot I hung out and helped with the other women for a bit. Then I headed home for a quick change and headed over to Allen's house. Allen, Stephen, Kristine and I all hung out for a bit drinking and laughing. We then went to the Bloc Party concert. They were awesome live! I'm really pleased I bought the tickets as I loved it. After, we went back to Allen's for a bit and then I stopped by Trader Sam's bar to hang out with my boys for a little slice of time. Finally headed home. Probably the tamest St. Patty's Day I've had in years.

Slept for another 11 hours that night. Sunday I played volleyball in Golden Gate Park. Then I headed back over to Tanya's and we went for a long walk on Ocean Beach. After, we hung out at her house just chatting, reviewing the photos from the day before, chatting some more and just generally hanging out. It was great to be able to spend some 1:1 time with her. She's such a doll!

Got to bed way too late last night for being in at work at 7 this morning. Oh well, it was worth it.

Now, I know some of you are going to be asking me to see the photos. Well, here's the thing - order a calendar! It's a fundraiser, yo. :-) Actually, once the calendar is out I will be free to post some photos. You'll never believe it's me either!

On a more random note, I decided to get my resume in order and apply for a job a friend sent me. It looks like it'd be a perfect fit. I'm so done with my current job. I can't wait to hand in my notice! Keep your fingers crossed for me. Time to go work on the resume...

This moment of photo glory was brought to you by the letter P and the number 50.

Yippee!

Today I fit in a skirt I haven't been able to wear before.

Kind of a nice reminder that even though I haven't been able to workout, I'm still taking better care of myself.

This moment of yippee was brought to you by the letter W and the number 15.

PS - Buzz - I'm waiting on others for photos. Sorry mate. Out of my hands.

Betty Ford Rehab Hash Recap

Holy crap, what a weekend! Thursday I started with conference calls at 6am. That was 6-12, meeting 12-2, 2-3 and 3-4. Headed out the door at 4:30 to get some errands accomplished before going home to pack and get waxed. It was a bit of a hectic evening and we didn't even start the waxing until after 10pm. Got to bed around 1am after throwing things into a suitcase. Was up at 8 to shower and head to the Milbrae BART station where Panty Free and I were leaving our cars for the weekend. PF was running late so I went ahead and hopped BART to SFO, got the Air Shuttle to the right terminal, checked in and headed on through security. By the time I hit the gate they were boarding. PF had just sent me a text message that the next train was in 5 minutes. I had a sneaking suspicion she wasn't going to be joining me on this flight. Turns out she ran like a madwoman and ended up checking bags AND making it through security in time for last call. Rock star! Mossy Patch was also on our same flight

We flew into Palm Springs, grabbed our bags and the three of us split a cab to the hash hotel. They managed to get our rooms ready in time so we were able to check-in and drop our stuff. PF and I had each gotten adjoining rooms. Bloeing Inc was flying in from Singapore and going to share with me. Snowball was coming in from Denver and going to stay with PF. Can you say party central? I thought you could. After grabbing some lunch we put one our swimsuits, loads of sunscreen and hit the pool. Ran into the boys there and got them into the rooms. Spent the rest of the afternoon lounging poolside and soaking up some sun. Got to catch up with tons of folks I hadn't seen in ages - Blow Ho, Max Lode, Manhole Muncher, Happy, the rest of the Santa Barbara crew, Xena, etc. Then it was time to put on our lingerie and head out the door for the lingerie "run". It was a great trail this year that consisted of a pre-lube gay bar and then two pubs on trail. Then we were straight to the party after. My kind of trail! SB, BI, PF and I all made a pit stop on the way at some Mexican restaurant and grabbed a bite to eat in our lingerie. People were entertained.

The Hash Band was playing that night. Ended up meeting some guy - Just Sean - who apparently isn't a hasher at all. He had seen us from his hotel room at the Hyatt, ordered a bathrobe from the hotel and tagged along to the end. Ingenius! He was a pretty cool cat and as it turns out actually lives in San Francisco and was just down for work. We ended up having a nice little makeout session. Around 1am he walked me back to the hotel, got my number and then I crashed out. Turns out I had the room to myself that night as apparently the drunk ones thought I was going to hook up with the guy and all stayed in the other room together. Too funny. Thoughtful, but funny. Around 6:30am BI knocks on the door and I roll out of bed to let him in. He and PF went on a food and gatorade run. SB and I ended up combining into one room and getting some more sleep until they came back. Yes, that means the drinking started at 7:30am. You can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning!

Saturday consisted of lots of pool time. While some freaks went out on the actual run in 97 degree weather, those of us who are smart stayed poolside. We also gathered the Hash Wenches to practice our skit for the evening. We eventually walked over to the party. Here's where there was a bit of a communication breakdown. We thought we had 2 hours for dinner before the skits started. None of us were that interested in the food they were serving and SB wanted to go back and shower. So, the four of us headed back to the hotel and waited while he freshened up. We then went back and ate at a rather disappointing Italian place close to the venue. When we rolled back in the skits were almost finished and they had ended up cancelling ours since PF and I weren't there. We wouldn't have had time to get in our outfits before they ended so we were S.O.L.

It was sweet, actually. We had a number of people come up and tell us how disappointed they were that we didn't perform and that our skit was the only reason they even watch the skits. We were bummed too, but we'll just save it for North/South this year as it's a fabulous song!

Hung out at the venue with GlibGal, her bf, SB, BI, Max Lode, Scrummy and numerous others. We eventually decided to do a pub crawl. That turned into loads of entertainment. Man, talk about drunken pumpkins! I can't wait to see the photos. We were out until bar time and then finally stumbled back to the rooms. We were all pretty beat, but spent some time at the hot tub before calling it a night. Hit the sack around 3:30am. We were up again around 8am and the drinking started once again. The four of us had a mellow morning just drinking in our room and lounging on the bed. BI was a train wreck and passed out eventually. As any good hasher would, we used a small version of the P.O.K. (Pass Out Kit) on him. He now had a bright green sharpie 3rd eye and a mustache. People kept floating in and out of the room. We eventually headed to the pool where PF and I continued our white trash tradition of putting pool chairs in the kiddie pool and sitting there in the water getting some rays. BI woke up and came out to join us. In true BI fashion, he totally owned the third eye and mustache and had a field day playing it up. My cheeks hurt from laughter.

People eventually started heading out. We finally showered and headed to dinner around 7:30. The restaurant had a 45 minute wait so we sat in the bar and ordered some beverages and some appetizers. I had some iced tea and let me tell you, it was the most refreshing drink I had all weekend! After about an hour we got a table and had dinner. It was Scrummy, Escrowtum, Rarely Cums, PF, SB, BI and for a bit Tits Ahoy. As always, it was pure entertainment. We eventually headed back to the hotel (around 10pm) to pack our bags and order a cab for an early ride to the airport the next morning.

Ended up getting woken up by BI around 5am and helped the train wreck search for his wallet. After finding it (and several other things he had lost - except his dignity which somehow remained elusive) we hung out some more and then I had to get ready to go. The cab came at 6am so PF and I said our goodbyes to the boys and headed to the airport. Had a long day at work yesterday considering how tired I was. I think I was in bed at 9:30 last night. A few more nights of that and maybe I'll have a voice again soon! ;-)

All in all, a wonderful weekend. It was great to hang out with my boys again who I don't get to see nearly enough of. Once a year is absolutely not enough. The nice thing is I get loaded up with enough funny stories to last me until the next time I see them. I think we've all decided to meet up in Perth next year for Interhash. Consider this your warning Australia! Sunshine, pool, good friends, catching up with folks I hadn't seen in ages, learning interesting developments in friends' lives, bottomless adult beverages....what more could anyone ask?

Once people send me links to photos I'll try and share some. I didn't have a camera, but the boys did so there should be some good shots.

This moment of happy memories was brought to you by the letters BF and the number 21.

Halter Tops and Sleep Cycles

What do they have in common? Why, absolutely nothing! However, they were both on my mind in the shower this morning so you get one giant blog full of random things.

Yesterday I went swimsuit shopping (again) as I need a swimsuit for the Betty Ford Rehab Hash in Palm Springs this weekend. Last week I went to Target where I usually find some pretty cute suits. Everything was either a bikini (I wouldn't do that to y'all) or a halter top tankini. Now, I love tankinis. They had some really cute ones. The problem - they are all halter tops! Halter tops are cute. Halter tops are even sexy. There's just one issue - halter tops are cute and sexy when you don't have big boobs! Now, I think we all know that I do and therefore halter tops look like hell on me. I gave up on Target and last night hit my favorite chubby punk rock girl store - Torrid. I expect Torrid to understand the halter top plight suffered by those of us with large breasts. Every suit except one was a halter top. What gives??? I'm happy for all those women out there with tiny breasts who look good in a halther top. But please, please, PLEASE designers everywhere...show some love for those of us who are more fortunately endowed.

Got home around 6:30pm. Yesterday was my first day back at work after being sick. I felt like I needed a nap all day. Decided to take a quick one from 6:30-7:45. Plan was to then get up, eat dinner, watch Gilmore Girls (my guilty pleasure) and then hit the hay. Well, I did wake up at 7:45. And again at 10:30. And again at 1am. Had to go to the bathroom so I made the mistake of getting up. So now it's 1am, I've gotten 6.5 hours of sleep already and I'm wide awake. Watched bad TV until about 3am when I finally fell back asleep until I had to get up for work this morning. Was absolutely ravenous since I didn't get dinner last night. Somehow I'm thinking I really needed the sleep though! Feel surprisingly good today considering I was up from 1-3am.

Tonight I get to see my friend from Australia again. She's in town with her boyfriend and their little daughter. I can't wait!! It'll be great to catch up. The only bad part is I have meetings starting at 6am tomorrow. That means I'll be leaving work early though, getting a pedicure and packing for my trip. Strawberry will be coming by that evening for a little waxing session so I'll be good to go to lounge about in swimwear in the 90 degree weather this weekend. Woohoo!

Yes, life is looking up! Now if we could just get this halter top thing sorted.... :-)

This moment of randomness was brought to you by the letter H and the number 9.

They Walk Among Us

Many of you have heard me complain about being surrounded by idiots. Got this today and thought it was a prime example and a little humor for a Tuesday. Enjoy!

=======================================================
I walked into a Burger King with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a
sandwich. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little
chalkboard that said "buy one-get one free". "They're already buy-
one-get-one-free", she said, "so I guess they're both free".
She handed me my free sandwiches and I walked out the door.

They walk among us and many work retail.

===================

One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when
one of them shouted, "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked
up at the sky and said, "Where?"

They Walk among us!

====================

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent
which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want
the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun
rise in the north?"
When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has
for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up
with that stuff."

They Walk Among Us!!

====================

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day
I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center
was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a
day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific
time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific."

They Walk Among Us!

====================

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a
seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.

They Walk Among Us!

====================

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were
discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The
cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

They Walk Among Us!

====================

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to
the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never
showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a
trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me,
"has your plane arrived yet?"

They Walk Among Us!

====================

While at a Pizza Hut I observed a man ordering a small
pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he
would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some
time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm
hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."

Yep, They Walk Among Us!

===================


This moment of lunacy was brought to you by the letter I and the number 1,000,000

Slowly Feeling More Human

My fever finally broke on Friday. Hooray! Spoke to my doctor that day as well. She wished I had called her the day before as I have the flu and you have to start taking those drugs in the first 48 hours. Since I didn't, she gave me stuff to help with all the phlegm in my chest and the ensuing issues with asthma it was causing. My chest was so sore from coughing - my sternum even hurt when I would breathe. Just to add to the fun my monthly visitor decided to pop in for a visit as well.

Now that I've got my drugs I'm feeling more human. Just still tired. Amazed at how quickly I'm drained - even something simple like taking a shower causes me to have to sit down and rest for a bit. Bummed I missed the O'Hotties sleepover this weekend. That was disappointing. Hopefully I'll be all all recovered before heading to Palm Springs this weekend.

This moment of feeling more human was brought to you by the letter D and the number 4.

The Misery Continues

Still feeling like garbage today. Yesterday I had been cold all day. Finally put on sweats. Fell asleep on the couch about 10:30. Woke up 4 hours later completely drenched in sweat. As in, drenched through the sweatshirt and this was *after* taking an ibuprofen to reduce the fever. Yikes!

Was feeling a bit better this morning, but as the day goes by I am feeling worse again. Hacking up some nasty stuff from my lungs. Though I have a sinus headache, I'm really not congested. Just tired, achey, still a bit of a fever, cough, etc.

I want my mommy!

This moment of self-pity was brought to you by the letter S and the number 3.