Some people have asked how the memorial weekend went. Here's what I wrote in an email to a friend.
The weekend was good. There wasn't a lot of time for emotional processing. It's hard to do when others are around. My fave cousin Vinny picked me up at the airport. My brother picked up my cousin Jim and his son Mark V. at the other airport in Dallas. We met at Sam's Club and started shopping. It was quite an excursion with stops at 3 different stores and more food than God. We then drove down to the lake and unpacked everything. We took the boat out and went straight to put some gas in it. The daughter and son-in-law of Jack's longterm friend/girlfriend had been using the boat on some weekends. Well, we made it about 2/3 of the way there and the engine died - out of gas. We were not happy. Luckily we had a trolling motor and made a long slow journey the rest of the way. We filled it up, but then we still couldn't start her as the batteries were low. My cousin ended up hitching a ride back to the house to get my brother's car and the jumper cables to jump the boat. Eventually she started turning over and we were good to go. We plugged her in when we got back to the dock and she was fine the rest of the time. That night was a big drinking session, but a lot of fun.
Friday morning the rental and floral deliveries started arriving. We began cleaning the house and taking care of all the stuff we could. Then we went and met Royce, our fishing guide, at 1pm. It was a great afternoon on the water! We each easily caught over 100 fish. However, how many of those were actually big enough to keep is a different story. We ended up with about 50 fish at the end of the day. Jimmy caught the biggest fish - a nice catfish. I caught the most keepers - 12. Royce was loving the fact that I was the only girl and I caught the most fish. Someone had to keep the boys in line. :-) It was a really fun afternoon. We then went back to the house, hopped in the boat and went out to go for a swim. When Vinny had been down there when Uncle Jack was sit, they used to go out every evening and watch the sun set. He wanted to do the same thing so we did, only this time we watched it from in the water, a beer in hand and toasting Uncle Jack. It was really nice.
We headed back to the house and my cousin Mark arrived. Vinny's wife, Becky, their two kids and my sis-in-law Lisa showed up close to midnight. Jimmy and my brother had printed out a bunch of photos so that night Mark and I put the collages together. There were some great photos and it was a hilarious trip down memory lane. We finally finished around 2am.
Saturday morning was filled with cooking, setting up the tents and chairs, icing drinks, etc. We had probably close to 40 people. Some who had RSVPd didn't show, but it's okay. It was a really nice gathering. It was a great to finally meet so many people whose names I had heard for years. We had a table in front with his ashes, the flag (he had served in the Army), the flowers that had been sent and several W.C. Fields things Jack had collected as he was a huge fan. We had 4 easels we put on either side of the table with the collage photos and a framed photo of Jack. It was pretty informal, though we tarted up a bit. We started with Vinny welcoming everyone. Then my brother did an opening prayer. I read two poems. Then we opened it up for people to share stories. It was great to hear all these wonderful stories from people about my uncle. I learned a lot of things I didn't know. One of the guys there had known him for over 60 years. It was clear that everyone there really loved him and thought of the world of him. We then went down by the lake. My brother did a closing prayer/poem and we spread some ashes. Then we fed everyone (and had way too many leftovers). People eventually started to trickle away. It took us a bit to get everything cleaned up.
We went out at sunset again with everyone. We did some swimming and then as the sun started to touch the horizon my brother did a prayer, we had some silence and then we each spread some ashes. After, we pulled the boat as my brother is taking it back to Missouri. We just did leftovers for dinner and had some final time together. My brother and Lisa took off at 6am the next morning. Mark left at 8. The rest of us did more cleaning and then took off at noon for the airport. Everyone except Vinny that is who stayed an extra day or two to finish organizing things. He has to drive my uncle's Cobra out to Colorado where we are going to try and sell it.
They lost my bag on the flight home. Though we spread some at the lake, we each brought some back to do with/spread where we wanted. It was just a cluster once we got off the plane. The plane landed at 5:45 and I didn't get home until 8pm. They started us on one carousel which then jammed so they moved us to another. Then they moved us to yet another. About 30 of us never got our bags. They were trying to figure out what happened when the same thing happened to folks on the Miami flight as well. So then there is a huge queue to talk with the baggage people. I'm dealing with her and all she says is, "If it turns up, we'll deliver it to you." I said, "Can you at least tell me if it left Dallas?" "No." "So these barcodes are essentially just for show?" "Yep, it's all manual." Whiskey Tango Foxtrot? She then said if I wanted I could wait another 15-30 minutes to see if any other bags came up, but she doubted they would. I decided since I had already waited an hour, what's another 15 minutes? I was on the phone with my brother and a bit of a wreck. Bags finally started appearing on our original carousel and there mine was. Thank goodness!
I decided to take Super Shuttle home. I was in Terminal 3 so figured all we had to do was go to the International Terminal and then I would be heading home. We did, but then they went back to Terminal 1 to pick up someone else. Finally we were on our way. The woman he picked up last was the stereotypical Jewish American Princess. I was ready to smack her. We had to drop one guy at a hotel in Daly City. I think she just assumed that she would be taken straight home. The guy didn't have an address for the hotel and the driver was trying to find it. She was berating the driver and berating the other passenger and this that and the other. The driver finally said, "Ma'am, do you want me to pull over so you can drive?" It was like that the entire drive home. He (thankfully) dropped her off next so we were chatting about her as he drove me home. She was such a piece of work. I was ready to go postal on her. All I could think was, a) I was picked up first b) I'm in a lot of shoulder pain and c) they lost my bag with my uncle's ashes in it so who (the f*ck) are you to be bitching right now?
My shoulder has been bugging me since Thursday. I was sore on Wed from climbing the night before. Figured it was a continuation of that. However, it just kept getting worse and worse. It ached all the time and spread down into my bicep, forearm and my hand/couple fingers. I was pretty worried when flying back as I would try to pick up my beverage to take a drink and my hand was shaking. I had left a message for William (my trainer/healer) and spoke to my buddy Allen who used to do PT work. William called me yesterday morning and basically said it's just all a physical manifestation of all the emotional crap I'm dealing (or not) with right now. I guess it shouldn't surprise me as that's what we worked through initially when I saw him. I just kinda thought I was doing a lot better with it and this wouldn't occur again. At least I know it's that and not something seriously wrong. It actually held up okay yesterday when working out. After a good cry last night it seems to be back to normal today. Amazing really.
I know I still owe some blogs about my Australia trip and a bunch of other things. I'll get to them eventually. I have to fly to Houston this afternoon for work and will return on Friday night. Hopefully my bag will make it with me. :-)
This moment of recap was brought to you by the letter D and the number 68.
