Wednesday, November 07, 2012

Why is it?

Why is it the simplest lessons have been the hardest for me to learn thus far?

For instance:

1. I am always 100% me. Even when trying to emulate someone else, that is still 100% me.
2. Everything is a choice. Even when I've thought I've had none, it's always a choice. Even when I have mistakenly believed that I can't find stability/settle down and maintain my freedom. I've chosen that balance point to be too far on the freedom side, mistakenly believing that I can't have both or that there is no balance.

Man, I'm a slow learner! But now I choose to learn these things more quickly. ;-)

The above knowledge is terrifying, yet liberating. I like it. I'm trying to make a game of it really.

I was thinking about this tonight while watching the soft twilight over the harbour. Felt a heavy weight on my face and lower jaw, almost pulling me down to the ground. Also felt a big weight on my neck and torso and base of skull. I simply tried to thank them for what they had done and that I was grateful for their help, but now I was choosing to move forward without them. Had quite a few of those weird "vertigo" moments, but seem to feel a lot lighter now. Certainly hope all this is shifting the way I think it is!!

Anyway, here's to learning lessons far more easily in the future.

This moment of wonder was brought to you by the letter L and the number 2.