Men Say (and Do) the Darndest Things

Yesterday was a rather entertaining day in terms of interactions with random men. The morning started off well. I went to my chiropractor before heading to work. As I was walking back to my car on Van Ness, I looked at the man walking in front of me. He was strutting down the street and had this cute tan bag slung over his shoulder. When I looked more closely, the bag had some writing on it. I did a double take because I was sure it couldn't say what it really did. Sure enough, it said, "Good Vibrations". Now, don't get me wrong. Being an avid fan of Good Vibes, I know they have items for men as well. However, the last thing I ever expected to see was a man walking down the street proudly wearing a bag with Good Vibrations splayed across it. Made me laugh. Good on ya sir!

Later that day I was in the elevator at work. I had my Tinker Bell purse with me that day. Yeah, I'm a chick, what do you want? Anyway, this middle-aged man was on the elevator with me. All of a sudden he said, "That is a really cute purse. Where did you get it?" Once I'd recovered from my shock I did manage to refrain from asking if he wanted it for himself and how pink really was his colour. Then he went on to explain his cover story of how his daughters are huge Tinker Bell fans. Yeah buddy, whatever. You don't need to make up a cover story. This is (South) San Francisco. It's okay to be that way! Ok, so those were just the thoughts running through my head. I can occasionally apply a filter. Anyway, he stayed on the elvator past his floor to find out the store where I had purchased it and kept telling me over and over again how cute it was. I have to admit I found it rather entertaining.

A third story, though this took place over the weekend. Sunday was the final day of the Novato Ren Faire. Some friends and I went to hang out and drink. Ran into someone I know, but hadn't seen since Northern Faire last year. He wraps me in a big hug, gropes me a little and says to himself, "Yep, still solid." Then he proceeds to say the following, "You know, I'm generally only attracted to petite women. But there is just something about you....your personality." I interject with a smile, "Are you telling me I have a great personality?" (aka the kiss of death) He said, "Well, yes you do, but it's more than that. You have a great face and even though you're the size you are, you're just solid underneath." Instead of vocalizing one of the many thoughts running through my head (damn, I'm getting good at applying a filter!) I forced myself to think that somewhere, in that Y chromosome brain of his, he thought he was giving me a compliment. So I just smiled, said 'Thank you' and extracated myself before he could dig a deeper hole. And yes, I do actually believe he thought he was being complimentary.

Men...can't live with 'em....pass the beer nuts.